{moving through grief}

Yesterday morning I was thinking how nice it was that I was finally getting to a point where I can remember BigCat without the overwhelming pain and feelings of loss that have consumed me since we said goodbye.

Then last night without any warning I cried and cried because I miss him so much and it hurts so much to be without him.

That's how it's been these last few months. Some days I'm ok, most days I'm not. Most days I cry at some point in the day. Every day I miss him more than I thought possible. And every now and then there's a moment of peace, where it doesn't feel achingly sad.

That's how grief goes hey? There's no controlling it and there's no quick way out. It's a journey, a process of healing that happens in it's own time and it's own way. And you've just got to live with it.

{emerging}

Slowly but surely I am coming back to some kind of equilibrium. It's been a hard slog these past few weeks. A lot of tears and a lot of pain, and the deepest sense of loss. I miss my boy so much. I don't feel like life will ever be the same. And I guess it probably won't. But I'm sure time will work its healing magic.

Life is finally starting to settle down again. The new house is unpacked and starting to feel like home. Some dramas with our former landlord have now been resolved, in our favour too.

Generally I think we are over the humps of the last 12 months with the potential for a period of smooth sailing. I hope so.

Enjoy the weekend peeps. I'll be back with some {sunday snippets} as I have a fabulous weekend planned.