{change it is}

it's taken a while to settle on my word for 2013.  i started out with 'ambition' but it somehow felt a little too one dimensional.  the word 'balance' kept coming up in my daily writing as something i really want to focus on this year but it didn't feel quite right either.  i also like the idea of 'filling the well' and 'accentuating the positive' {the title of the quilt michelle gave me}.

i wondered what word might somehow bring all these ideas together and i wondered what is it that i really, really, really want for this year?  the answer that came to me is change.

now is probably a good time to tell you how much i struggle with change.  how the very idea of it makes my heart beat faster and my anxiety levels rise.  mostly it's the idea of it more than the reality.  but even simple things like thinking about rearranging the house, changing breakfast cereals, planning a new routine or changing my mind about plans i've already made can send me into a spin.

which is why i knew it was the perfect word.

there are already some pretty major changes on the cards for 2013 {like starting a new job in 2 weeks time - i will spill all very soon} and there are changes i've been talking about for quite a few years {losing weight, exercising more, being healthier}. then there are simple and small changes i want to make {how much time i spend online and what on, pampering myself more, wearing perfume}, new ideas i want to embrace {ethical eating, simple living} and new things i want to try {wine appreciation, cooking classes, encaustics}. 

this year i want to embrace the changes that i know are coming my way. i want to consciously make changes, especially the ones that i've been talking about for a good long while now.  and the big thing i want to work on is letting go of my fear of change.  because i figure on the other side of this who knows what exciting opportunities, new adventures and abundant goodness might be waiting for me.