{the cold hard truth}

I had this great post planned for my return from holidays.  I had a great title planned and everything: {read, eat, sleep, repeat}.  I'd been writing it in my mind for days.

I was going to tell you all about the fabulous time I had taking it easy.  How wonderful it was to relax and unwind.  How easily I fell into a routine of reading and sleeping and eating.  I wanted to tell you how stepping away from my regular life always creates space for new thoughts to take hold and how I realised a few important things while I was away, particularly that I want to work harder at being a positive person and to challenge myself to focus more on all the good in my life.

Yep, I had it all planned.

We arrived home around 5pm in the peak of today's stormy weather.  We unpacked in the rain and started putting things away, loading the washing machine, etc, etc.  Then I looked up at the ceiling in the bedroom and saw that it was raining inside ....

3 hours later, a lot of time spent on the phone to real estate agents, a visit from the State Emergency Service and a plumber scheduled to visit tomorrow we no longer have a leaking roof.  It's still raining in the bedroom though because all the water pooled in the ceiling has to make it's way through the plaster.  The roof is patched not fixed.  I'm not sure if we'll be able to sleep in our bed because the water keeps spreading and the noise of it dripping, dripping, dripping is quite annoying.  I'm worn out and instead of having a lovely night at home it's been an absolute pain in the ass.  I've tried to be positive and to look for the adventure in all this but the truth is I'm tired and I feel like the universe is just asking too damn much of me.  I said I wanted to work harder at being more positive but I didn't realise I'd have to be ready for it straight away.

I thought about posting {read, eat, sleep, repeat} just as I'd planned it.  I thought perhaps that would be the positive thing to do.  But it wouldn't have been the truth.  And if there's one thing I'm absolutely passionate about it's authenticity and truth.

I don't know how I find the balance between being a more positive person and allowing myself to be genuine in my feelings about things.  It's something I'm going to have to work at I realise.  I'm not sure that I'll ever be a person who can take these glitches easily in my stride.  In fact it always seems to be the minor things much more than the really big stuff that really brings me unstuck.  

But I am going to work at it.  I am going to work at being more positive.  Maybe just not tonight!

Anyway, it's good to be back.  And Blogtoberfest is just 3 sleeps away.  The sign up post will be up on Friday 30 September.