{change it is}

it's taken a while to settle on my word for 2013.  i started out with 'ambition' but it somehow felt a little too one dimensional.  the word 'balance' kept coming up in my daily writing as something i really want to focus on this year but it didn't feel quite right either.  i also like the idea of 'filling the well' and 'accentuating the positive' {the title of the quilt michelle gave me}.

i wondered what word might somehow bring all these ideas together and i wondered what is it that i really, really, really want for this year?  the answer that came to me is change.

now is probably a good time to tell you how much i struggle with change.  how the very idea of it makes my heart beat faster and my anxiety levels rise.  mostly it's the idea of it more than the reality.  but even simple things like thinking about rearranging the house, changing breakfast cereals, planning a new routine or changing my mind about plans i've already made can send me into a spin.

which is why i knew it was the perfect word.

there are already some pretty major changes on the cards for 2013 {like starting a new job in 2 weeks time - i will spill all very soon} and there are changes i've been talking about for quite a few years {losing weight, exercising more, being healthier}. then there are simple and small changes i want to make {how much time i spend online and what on, pampering myself more, wearing perfume}, new ideas i want to embrace {ethical eating, simple living} and new things i want to try {wine appreciation, cooking classes, encaustics}. 

this year i want to embrace the changes that i know are coming my way. i want to consciously make changes, especially the ones that i've been talking about for a good long while now.  and the big thing i want to work on is letting go of my fear of change.  because i figure on the other side of this who knows what exciting opportunities, new adventures and abundant goodness might be waiting for me.

{things i'm diggin}

Kicking starting my new year with the Soul Business Sessions co-hosted by Beth Nicholls and Kelly Rae Roberts.  For years I've struggled to create a business plan for myself using traditional notions of business and planning.  I'm so excited for what this course will hold for me and my fledgling enterprise.  It feels like the timing is perfect.

CurlyPops latest endeavour.  I'm going to post my answers to the questions tomorrow.  Please join in and help this important cause.

Andrea's trip to Mexico.  I can remember how long she's been talking about wanting to paint and I'm so excited that she's taking this bold step.

Hatching a stupendously cool new project with three awesome women.

Feeling strong and grounded and more certain as I make my way into this new year.

Putting my custom 'word of the year' paintings out there into the world.  I'm crazy proud of these babies.

Ok, I'm off to my favourite art shop to buy supplies.

Have a lovely weekend peeps!

{what's in a word}

I've been dancing with words for a long while now but I was surprised to discover that choosing my word for the year went all the way back to 2009 when I chose the word ENJOY.  

The practice of choosing a word has become quite sacred actually.  Because I've come to see how powerful it can be.  Over the years these words ENJOY, SHINE, SURRENDER and RESOLVE have carried me and guided me.  When times get tough I recite my word like a mantra, when I'm not sure which way to go I look to my word to help me find my way, when I need to ground myself I look to my word.  I have completely fallen in love with this practice.

For 2012 I've chosen the word NOURISH.  I want to NOURISH myself in every possible way.  Home, health, heart, art, business, creativity, relationships, finances, etc.  And I want to NOURISH others too.  This is to be a year of goodness, of abundance, of joy.  I can't wait to see how this word travels with me.  Already I'm embracing it and letting it guide me.

I've decided to so something a bit special this year with the 'word of the year' concept.  I'm offering custom made 'word of the year' paintings.  Your word and your favourite colour/s transformed into an original painting made especially for you.  They're in my Etsy shop now.  Pop on over and take a look.

{my story captured}

"...sometimes I ask to sneak a closer look,

skip to the final chapter of the book..."

                                             The Wood Song - Indigo Girls

Day by day, and year by year, going right back into my early teens.  Pages and pages, volumes of ink on paper {the photo shows only part of the collection}.  Capturing the minutiae and the extraordinary, the triumphs and the falls. Words have always been such a part of my journey.

Sometimes I wonder who will be the caretaker of my stories when I'm gone.  Who will read this story of my life?  And what will they make of it?

{a journey with words}

there's one final thing to do before diving into 2011 body, mind and soul.

i love the tradition of picking a word for the year.  i started thinking about it a few weeks back, letting different words arrive and then sit with me for a couple of days. seeing how they felt alongside my intentions.

i started off with 'rest', shortly followed by 'gentle' and then 'rejuvenate' showed up in my journaling one morning.

'rejuvenate' [verb]: make (someone or something) look or feel younger, fresher or more lively

while i knew that i wanted the year to be about renewing and reenergising so many aspects of my life, i wasn't so keen on the implied notion of youthfulness being a desired state.  somehow it felt like i'd be foregoing the lessons i learned throughout last year and trying to step backwards in time.  it seemed that what was speaking to me was the idea of change.

'change' [verb]: make or become different; transform

with all my heart i want 2011 to be different to 2010.  there are things i want more of and things i want less of.  i want me to be different too.  if you look at my list it's obvious there's things about myself i want to transform.  i talked here about juxtaposition, and when i sit 2010 and 2011 side by side at the end of the year i'd hope to see real contrast.

somehow though 'change' didn't quite encapsulate what i was reaching for.  i was looking for a word that i could hold onto, that i could carry with me, that would ground me when i needed it {in the same way that surrender was a touchstone for me last year}.  i wanted something more solid.

'power' [noun]: ability to do or act; capability of doing or accomplishing something
 
for a brief moment, when i saw this message from the universe on the frankston esplanade, i entertained notions of power.  but once again it just didn't sit quite right.

yesterday i was back in the studio doing some early morning journaling.  i was writing about my commitment to making 2011 a really wonderful year, noting my strength and my resolve to making things different.  and just like that, there it was.  a quiet and gentle word, yet full of the strength and determination that's been calling to me. my word for 2011...

'resolve' [noun]: firm determination to do something

I Still Can't Find Them

Heffernan Lane, Melbourne

I've looked under the bed,
in the pantry,
on the desk at work,
in amidst the piles of autumn leaves lying in the gutters.

On the streets as I ride along,
 in the neighbours chook shed,
and even deep within myself.
All to no avail.

I have no words
Not for you, not for me.

Philosophy 101

Installation - Heffernan Lane, Melbourne*

The countdown is on. It's really on. 13 sleeps peeps. 13 sleeps. Are you counting the sleeps with me?

*******************************************************

*I have no idea what this installation is about, who created it or how long it will be there. I often wander through Melbourne's laneways rather than sticking to the main streets. There it was presenting itself to me. A laneway filled with signs and words. Just the reminder I need right now. Keep the balance Tinniegirl. SURRENDER.

I Heart Words...

Toilet door, Myer City Store, Melbourne

...especially those found scribbled in toilets, sprayed on walls, stenciled on footpaths. Words to make you think, words to make you smile and words that make you stop for a moment before you say "ah, I get it".

*********************************************************

I've been playing house here on my blog. Tidying, rearranging and de-cluttering to make way for the new decade, and all that it might bring. I got rid of the followers list but I've added the RSS button so you can easily add me to a reader.

I've got a few more finishing touches to make but I'm really liking the clean, fresh look. I did a little bit of house-keeping over at the Northern Craft Bonanza too.

Matters Of The Heart

It's been a tough week. Saying goodbye to friends is the hardest thing to do. There's lots of words floating around in my head but they're not making their way out into the world. They're coming though. Soon.

******************************************************

Speaking of soon, the Northern Craft Bonanza kicks off next Thursday night. All the details are here. Please do come along. Everyone is welcome and I would love to see you there.