Friday, February 11, 2011

{reality is:}

Work in progress - Week 1
Work in progress
Acrylics on canvas
8 x 10 inch

that my life feels so completely different to how it felt 5 weeks ago
that I absolutely looooove pay day
that there is little to no time for painting, blogging or the other things that make me really happy
that work, exercise and healthy eating are taking up almost every bit of time and energy that I have
that no matter how much I sleep I seem to be tired all the time
that I could not have imagined how hard the transition back to full time work was going to be
that I constantly feel self conscious and uncertain
that I know that I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be
that there are some big and exciting decisions I am in the process of making 
that there are glimpses of hope

reality is:
made of sharp edges and hard lines at the moment
kicking my ass


  1. Hang in there Lovely! Sounds like you're doing everything right. Soon you'll be able to click on to cruise control and that happier healthier you can throw a few more balls into the air! (just to keep you on your toes)

    PS. Friday evenings are almost as good as pay day.

  2. And amen to that. I watch each morning the dark rings under my eyes get that much more darker, and the hours of sleep I get every night make no difference, and I wonder "Is this all there is?" And then I remind myself that I am living such a full life, striving every day for happiness, that I have to except a little dark circle-ness every now and then as part of the deal.

    Also, vitamin B works, apparently.

    Give yourself some time. When I first went back to full time work I didn't sew for months. It drove me crazy that I couldn't find the energy to do it. But it will come, the time and the energy and the ability to juggle a lot better, and also the ability to say "no" once in a while (saying no gives you heaps more time!!)

    Love the painting so, so much. it looks like a crazy-paved pathway. Like a journey waiting to be taken. You'll understand why I love it so much in a couple of weeks ... (ooh mystery!!)

  3. It's when reality is kicking your ass that you really know you're part of the human race.

  4. That piece is absolutely stunning! I'd say that you just about don't need to add anything else.
    Go easy on yourself. This is exactly as you say, a busy and trying time. But you are exactly where you need to be.
    Stretching and growing, in harmonious geometry.

  5. I hope you are feeling more energetic very soon I am sure you will, I hope you can have restful weekends and recharge and not take on too much like housework!! just chill. can't wait to hear about your big and exciting decisions???? do tell......

  6. Welcome back to the grind — and don't feel bad about feeling tired — we all do!

  7. I love payday too- all my whinging disappears but for a moment...

  8. We laugh and call that madness at the beginning of something new a learning curve. You will get to the point where it all gets easier, you just have to stick to it and be kind to yourself until it does. So take it easy you will get back to the painting it just might take longer than you thought.