Saturday, April 11, 2009

Flat


It's pretty flat around here at the minute. I'm feeling restless and bored, lost and disoriented. It's to be expected after the events of the week. Grief is such an overwhelming emotion. So consuming. It seeps into every corner of your being, taking hold of everything. So many memories, overwhelmingly wonderful and searingly painful. We rode the roller coaster together. That's how it is with true friendship.

So many questions now. So much anger, confusion, regret. In amongst it so many smiles and quiet happy thoughts. Memories of laughter, deep and heartfelt conversations, drunken nights, camping trips and creative dreams shared.

I know that time is what's needed. Time will soften the sharp stabbing pain of loss, bring peace to my aching soul. The memories too will soften, I know this cause I've ridden this ride before. It almost feels like a betrayal to know that it's going to get easier, to want it to happen. Wanting it doesn't make it happen though. Time is the only cure for grief.


In the meantime I'm soothing my soul with creativity and cuddles. Thank you universe for both these wonders. Thanks too for all your kind and thoughtful messages of support.